Speeches (Lines) for Speed
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# | Act, Scene, Line (Click to see in context) |
Speech text |
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(stage directions). [Enter SPEED] Speed. Sir Proteus, save you! Saw you my master? |
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Proteus. But now he parted hence, to embark for Milan. Speed. Twenty to one then he is shipp'd already,
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Proteus. Indeed, a sheep doth very often stray,
Speed. You conclude that my master is a shepherd, then,
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Proteus. I do. Speed. Why then, my horns are his horns, whether I wake or sleep. |
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Proteus. A silly answer and fitting well a sheep. Speed. This proves me still a sheep. |
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Proteus. True; and thy master a shepherd. Speed. Nay, that I can deny by a circumstance. |
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Proteus. It shall go hard but I'll prove it by another. Speed. The shepherd seeks the sheep, and not the sheep the
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Proteus. The sheep for fodder follow the shepherd; the
Speed. Such another proof will make me cry 'baa.' |
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Proteus. But, dost thou hear? gavest thou my letter to Julia? Speed. Ay sir: I, a lost mutton, gave your letter to her,
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Proteus. Here's too small a pasture for such store of muttons. Speed. If the ground be overcharged, you were best stick her. |
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Proteus. Nay: in that you are astray, 'twere best pound you. Speed. Nay, sir, less than a pound shall serve me for
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Proteus. You mistake; I mean the pound,—a pinfold. Speed. From a pound to a pin? fold it over and over,
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Proteus. But what said she? Speed. [First nodding] Ay. |
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Proteus. Nod—Ay—why, that's noddy. Speed. You mistook, sir; I say, she did nod: and you ask
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Proteus. And that set together is noddy. Speed. Now you have taken the pains to set it together,
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Proteus. No, no; you shall have it for bearing the letter. Speed. Well, I perceive I must be fain to bear with you. |
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Proteus. Why sir, how do you bear with me? Speed. Marry, sir, the letter, very orderly; having nothing
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Proteus. Beshrew me, but you have a quick wit. Speed. And yet it cannot overtake your slow purse. |
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Proteus. Come come, open the matter in brief: what said she? Speed. Open your purse, that the money and the matter may
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Proteus. Well, sir, here is for your pains. What said she? Speed. Truly, sir, I think you'll hardly win her. |
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Proteus. Why, couldst thou perceive so much from her? Speed. Sir, I could perceive nothing at all from her; no,
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Proteus. What said she? nothing? Speed. No, not so much as 'Take this for thy pains.' To
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(stage directions). [Enter VALENTINE and SPEED] Speed. Sir, your glove. |
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Valentine. Not mine; my gloves are on. Speed. Why, then, this may be yours, for this is but one. |
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Valentine. Ha! let me see: ay, give it me, it's mine:
Speed. Madam Silvia! Madam Silvia! |
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Valentine. How now, sirrah? Speed. She is not within hearing, sir. |
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Valentine. Why, sir, who bade you call her? Speed. Your worship, sir; or else I mistook. |
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Valentine. Well, you'll still be too forward. Speed. And yet I was last chidden for being too slow. |
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Valentine. Go to, sir: tell me, do you know Madam Silvia? Speed. She that your worship loves? |
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Valentine. Why, how know you that I am in love? Speed. Marry, by these special marks: first, you have
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Valentine. Are all these things perceived in me? Speed. They are all perceived without ye. |
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Valentine. Without me? they cannot. Speed. Without you? nay, that's certain, for, without you
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Valentine. But tell me, dost thou know my lady Silvia? Speed. She that you gaze on so as she sits at supper? |
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Valentine. Hast thou observed that? even she, I mean. Speed. Why, sir, I know her not. |
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Valentine. Dost thou know her by my gazing on her, and yet
Speed. Is she not hard-favoured, sir? |
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Valentine. Not so fair, boy, as well-favoured. Speed. Sir, I know that well enough. |
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Valentine. What dost thou know? Speed. That she is not so fair as, of you, well-favoured. |
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Valentine. I mean that her beauty is exquisite, but her favour infinite. Speed. That's because the one is painted and the other out
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Valentine. How painted? and how out of count? Speed. Marry, sir, so painted, to make her fair, that no
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Valentine. How esteemest thou me? I account of her beauty. Speed. You never saw her since she was deformed. |
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Valentine. How long hath she been deformed? Speed. Ever since you loved her. |
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Valentine. I have loved her ever since I saw her; and still I
Speed. If you love her, you cannot see her. |
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Valentine. Why? Speed. Because Love is blind. O, that you had mine eyes;
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Valentine. What should I see then? Speed. Your own present folly and her passing deformity:
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Valentine. Belike, boy, then, you are in love; for last
Speed. True, sir; I was in love with my bed: I thank you,
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Valentine. In conclusion, I stand affected to her. Speed. I would you were set, so your affection would cease. |
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Valentine. Last night she enjoined me to write some lines to
Speed. And have you? |
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Valentine. I have. Speed. Are they not lamely writ? |
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Valentine. No, boy, but as well as I can do them. Peace!
Speed. [Aside] O excellent motion! O exceeding puppet!
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Valentine. Madam and mistress, a thousand good-morrows. Speed. [Aside] O, give ye good even! here's a million of manners. |
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Silvia. Sir Valentine and servant, to you two thousand. Speed. [Aside] He should give her interest and she gives it him. |
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Silvia. A pretty period! Well, I guess the sequel;
Speed. [Aside] And yet you will; and yet another 'yet.' |
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(stage directions). [Exit] Speed. O jest unseen, inscrutable, invisible,
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Valentine. How now, sir? what are you reasoning with yourself? Speed. Nay, I was rhyming: 'tis you that have the reason. |
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Valentine. To do what? Speed. To be a spokesman for Madam Silvia. |
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Valentine. To whom? Speed. To yourself: why, she wooes you by a figure. |
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Valentine. What figure? Speed. By a letter, I should say. |
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Valentine. Why, she hath not writ to me? Speed. What need she, when she hath made you write to
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Valentine. No, believe me. Speed. No believing you, indeed, sir. But did you perceive
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Valentine. She gave me none, except an angry word. Speed. Why, she hath given you a letter. |
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Valentine. That's the letter I writ to her friend. Speed. And that letter hath she delivered, and there an end. |
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Valentine. I would it were no worse. Speed. I'll warrant you, 'tis as well:
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Valentine. I have dined. Speed. Ay, but hearken, sir; though the chameleon Love can
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Valentine. Mistress? Speed. Master, Sir Thurio frowns on you. |
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Valentine. Ay, boy, it's for love. Speed. Not of you. |
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Valentine. Of my mistress, then. Speed. 'Twere good you knocked him. |
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(stage directions). [Enter SPEED and LAUNCE severally] Speed. Launce! by mine honesty, welcome to Milan! |
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Launce. Forswear not thyself, sweet youth, for I am not
Speed. Come on, you madcap, I'll to the alehouse with you
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Launce. Marry, after they closed in earnest, they parted very
Speed. But shall she marry him? |
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Launce. No. Speed. How then? shall he marry her? |
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Launce. No, neither. Speed. What, are they broken? |
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Launce. No, they are both as whole as a fish. Speed. Why, then, how stands the matter with them? |
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Launce. Marry, thus: when it stands well with him, it
Speed. What an ass art thou! I understand thee not. |
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Launce. What a block art thou, that thou canst not! My
Speed. What thou sayest? |
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Launce. Ay, and what I do too: look thee, I'll but lean,
Speed. It stands under thee, indeed. |
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Launce. Why, stand-under and under-stand is all one. Speed. But tell me true, will't be a match? |
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Launce. Ask my dog: if he say ay, it will! if he say no,
Speed. The conclusion is then that it will. |
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Launce. Thou shalt never get such a secret from me but by a parable. Speed. 'Tis well that I get it so. But, Launce, how sayest
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Launce. I never knew him otherwise. Speed. Than how? |
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Launce. A notable lubber, as thou reportest him to be. Speed. Why, thou whoreson ass, thou mistakest me. |
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Launce. Why, fool, I meant not thee; I meant thy master. Speed. I tell thee, my master is become a hot lover. |
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Launce. Why, I tell thee, I care not though he burn himself
Speed. Why? |
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Launce. Because thou hast not so much charity in thee as to
Speed. At thy service. |
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(stage directions). [Enter SPEED] Speed. How now, Signior Launce! what news with your
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Launce. With my master's ship? why, it is at sea. Speed. Well, your old vice still; mistake the word. What
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Launce. The blackest news that ever thou heardest. Speed. Why, man, how black? |
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Launce. Why, as black as ink. Speed. Let me read them. |
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Launce. Fie on thee, jolt-head! thou canst not read. Speed. Thou liest; I can. |
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Launce. I will try thee. Tell me this: who begot thee? Speed. Marry, the son of my grandfather. |
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Launce. O illiterate loiterer! it was the son of thy
Speed. Come, fool, come; try me in thy paper. |
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Launce. There; and St. Nicholas be thy speed! Speed. [Reads] 'Imprimis: She can milk.' |
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Launce. Ay, that she can. Speed. 'Item: She brews good ale.' |
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Launce. And thereof comes the proverb: 'Blessing of your
Speed. 'Item: She can sew.' |
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Launce. That's as much as to say, Can she so? Speed. 'Item: She can knit.' |
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Launce. What need a man care for a stock with a wench, when
Speed. 'Item: She can wash and scour.' |
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Launce. A special virtue: for then she need not be washed
Speed. 'Item: She can spin.' |
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Launce. Then may I set the world on wheels, when she can
Speed. 'Item: She hath many nameless virtues.' |
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Launce. That's as much as to say, bastard virtues; that,
Speed. 'Here follow her vices.' |
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Launce. Close at the heels of her virtues. Speed. 'Item: She is not to be kissed fasting in respect
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Launce. Well, that fault may be mended with a breakfast. Read on. Speed. 'Item: She hath a sweet mouth.' |
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Launce. That makes amends for her sour breath. Speed. 'Item: She doth talk in her sleep.' |
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Launce. It's no matter for that, so she sleep not in her talk. Speed. 'Item: She is slow in words.' |
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Launce. O villain, that set this down among her vices! To
Speed. 'Item: She is proud.' |
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Launce. Out with that too; it was Eve's legacy, and cannot
Speed. 'Item: She hath no teeth.' |
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Launce. I care not for that neither, because I love crusts. Speed. 'Item: She is curst.' |
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Launce. Well, the best is, she hath no teeth to bite. Speed. 'Item: She will often praise her liquor.' |
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Launce. If her liquor be good, she shall: if she will not, I
Speed. 'Item: She is too liberal.' |
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Launce. Of her tongue she cannot, for that's writ down she
Speed. 'Item: She hath more hair than wit, and more faults
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Launce. Stop there; I'll have her: she was mine, and not
Speed. 'Item: She hath more hair than wit,'— |
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Launce. More hair than wit? It may be; I'll prove it. The
Speed. 'And more faults than hairs,'— |
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Launce. That's monstrous: O, that that were out! Speed. 'And more wealth than faults.' |
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Launce. Why, that word makes the faults gracious. Well,
Speed. What then? |
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Launce. Why, then will I tell thee—that thy master stays
Speed. For me? |
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Launce. For thee! ay, who art thou? he hath stayed for a
Speed. And must I go to him? |
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Launce. Thou must run to him, for thou hast stayed so long
Speed. Why didst not tell me sooner? pox of your love letters! |
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Third Outlaw. Stand, sir, and throw us that you have about ye:
Speed. Sir, we are undone; these are the villains
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First Outlaw. We'll have him. Sirs, a word. Speed. Master, be one of them; it's an honourable kind of thievery. |
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