Act III, Scene 3

The Grecian camp. Before Achilles’ tent.

[Enter AGAMEMNON, ULYSSES, DIOMEDES, NESTOR, AJAX,] [p]MENELAUS, and CALCHAS]

• Calchas. Now, princes, for the service I have done you,
  The advantage of the time prompts me aloud
  To call for recompense. Appear it to your mind
  That, through the sight I bear in things to love,
  I have abandon'd Troy, left my possession, 1870
  Incurr'd a traitor's name; exposed myself,
  From certain and possess'd conveniences,
  To doubtful fortunes; sequestering from me all
  That time, acquaintance, custom and condition
  Made tame and most familiar to my nature, 1875
  And here, to do you service, am become
  As new into the world, strange, unacquainted:
  I do beseech you, as in way of taste,
  To give me now a little benefit,
  Out of those many register'd in promise, 1880
  Which, you say, live to come in my behalf.

• Agamemnon. What wouldst thou of us, Trojan? make demand.

• Calchas. You have a Trojan prisoner, call'd Antenor,
  Yesterday took: Troy holds him very dear.
  Oft have you—often have you thanks therefore— 1885
  Desired my Cressid in right great exchange,
  Whom Troy hath still denied: but this Antenor,
  I know, is such a wrest in their affairs
  That their negotiations all must slack,
  Wanting his manage; and they will almost 1890
  Give us a prince of blood, a son of Priam,
  In change of him: let him be sent, great princes,
  And he shall buy my daughter; and her presence
  Shall quite strike off all service I have done,
  In most accepted pain. 1895

• Agamemnon. Let Diomedes bear him,
  And bring us Cressid hither: Calchas shall have
  What he requests of us. Good Diomed,
  Furnish you fairly for this interchange:
  Withal bring word if Hector will to-morrow 1900
  Be answer'd in his challenge: Ajax is ready.

• Diomedes. This shall I undertake; and 'tis a burden
  Which I am proud to bear.

[Exeunt DIOMEDES and CALCHAS]

[Enter ACHILLES and PATROCLUS, before their tent]

• Ulysses. Achilles stands i' the entrance of his tent:
  Please it our general to pass strangely by him,
  As if he were forgot; and, princes all,
  Lay negligent and loose regard upon him:
  I will come last. 'Tis like he'll question me 1910
  Why such unplausive eyes are bent on him:
  If so, I have derision medicinable,
  To use between your strangeness and his pride,
  Which his own will shall have desire to drink:
  It may be good: pride hath no other glass 1915
  To show itself but pride, for supple knees
  Feed arrogance and are the proud man's fees.

• Agamemnon. We'll execute your purpose, and put on
  A form of strangeness as we pass along:
  So do each lord, and either greet him not, 1920
  Or else disdainfully, which shall shake him more
  Than if not look'd on. I will lead the way.

• Achilles. What, comes the general to speak with me?
  You know my mind, I'll fight no more 'gainst Troy.

• Agamemnon. What says Achilles? would he aught with us? 1925

• Nestor. Would you, my lord, aught with the general?

• Achilles. No.

• Nestor. Nothing, my lord.

• Agamemnon. The better.

[Exeunt AGAMEMNON and NESTOR]

• Achilles. Good day, good day.

• Menelaus. How do you? how do you?

[Exit]

• Achilles. What, does the cuckold scorn me?

• Ajax. How now, Patroclus! 1935

• Achilles. Good morrow, Ajax.

• Ajax. Ha?

• Achilles. Good morrow.

• Ajax. Ay, and good next day too.

[Exit]

• Achilles. What mean these fellows? Know they not Achilles?

• Patroclus. They pass by strangely: they were used to bend
  To send their smiles before them to Achilles;
  To come as humbly as they used to creep
  To holy altars. 1945

• Achilles. What, am I poor of late?
  'Tis certain, greatness, once fall'n out with fortune,
  Must fall out with men too: what the declined is
  He shall as soon read in the eyes of others
  As feel in his own fall; for men, like butterflies, 1950
  Show not their mealy wings but to the summer,
  And not a man, for being simply man,
  Hath any honour, but honour for those honours
  That are without him, as place, riches, favour,
  Prizes of accident as oft as merit: 1955
  Which when they fall, as being slippery standers,
  The love that lean'd on them as slippery too,
  Do one pluck down another and together
  Die in the fall. But 'tis not so with me:
  Fortune and I are friends: I do enjoy 1960
  At ample point all that I did possess,
  Save these men's looks; who do, methinks, find out
  Something not worth in me such rich beholding
  As they have often given. Here is Ulysses;
  I'll interrupt his reading. 1965
  How now Ulysses!

• Ulysses. Now, great Thetis' son!

• Achilles. What are you reading?

• Ulysses. A strange fellow here
  Writes me: 'That man, how dearly ever parted, 1970
  How much in having, or without or in,
  Cannot make boast to have that which he hath,
  Nor feels not what he owes, but by reflection;
  As when his virtues shining upon others
  Heat them and they retort that heat again 1975
  To the first giver.'

• Achilles. This is not strange, Ulysses.
  The beauty that is borne here in the face
  The bearer knows not, but commends itself
  To others' eyes; nor doth the eye itself, 1980
  That most pure spirit of sense, behold itself,
  Not going from itself; but eye to eye opposed
  Salutes each other with each other's form;
  For speculation turns not to itself,
  Till it hath travell'd and is mirror'd there 1985
  Where it may see itself. This is not strange at all.

• Ulysses. I do not strain at the position,—
  It is familiar,—but at the author's drift;
  Who, in his circumstance, expressly proves
  That no man is the lord of any thing, 1990
  Though in and of him there be much consisting,
  Till he communicate his parts to others:
  Nor doth he of himself know them for aught
  Till he behold them form'd in the applause
  Where they're extended; who, like an arch, 1995
  reverberates
  The voice again, or, like a gate of steel
  Fronting the sun, receives and renders back
  His figure and his heat. I was much wrapt in this;
  And apprehended here immediately 2000
  The unknown Ajax.
  Heavens, what a man is there! a very horse,
  That has he knows not what. Nature, what things there are
  Most abject in regard and dear in use!
  What things again most dear in the esteem 2005
  And poor in worth! Now shall we see to-morrow—
  An act that very chance doth throw upon him—
  Ajax renown'd. O heavens, what some men do,
  While some men leave to do!
  How some men creep in skittish fortune's hall, 2010
  Whiles others play the idiots in her eyes!
  How one man eats into another's pride,
  While pride is fasting in his wantonness!
  To see these Grecian lords!—why, even already
  They clap the lubber Ajax on the shoulder, 2015
  As if his foot were on brave Hector's breast
  And great Troy shrieking.

• Achilles. I do believe it; for they pass'd by me
  As misers do by beggars, neither gave to me
  Good word nor look: what, are my deeds forgot? 2020

• Ulysses. Time hath, my lord, a wallet at his back,
  Wherein he puts alms for oblivion,
  A great-sized monster of ingratitudes:
  Those scraps are good deeds past; which are devour'd
  As fast as they are made, forgot as soon 2025
  As done: perseverance, dear my lord,
  Keeps honour bright: to have done is to hang
  Quite out of fashion, like a rusty mail
  In monumental mockery. Take the instant way;
  For honour travels in a strait so narrow, 2030
  Where one but goes abreast: keep then the path;
  For emulation hath a thousand sons
  That one by one pursue: if you give way,
  Or hedge aside from the direct forthright,
  Like to an enter'd tide, they all rush by 2035
  And leave you hindmost;
  Or like a gallant horse fall'n in first rank,
  Lie there for pavement to the abject rear,
  O'er-run and trampled on: then what they do in present,
  Though less than yours in past, must o'ertop yours; 2040
  For time is like a fashionable host
  That slightly shakes his parting guest by the hand,
  And with his arms outstretch'd, as he would fly,
  Grasps in the comer: welcome ever smiles,
  And farewell goes out sighing. O, let not 2045
  virtue seek
  Remuneration for the thing it was;
  For beauty, wit,
  High birth, vigour of bone, desert in service,
  Love, friendship, charity, are subjects all 2050
  To envious and calumniating time.
  One touch of nature makes the whole world kin,
  That all with one consent praise new-born gawds,
  Though they are made and moulded of things past,
  And give to dust that is a little gilt 2055
  More laud than gilt o'er-dusted.
  The present eye praises the present object.
  Then marvel not, thou great and complete man,
  That all the Greeks begin to worship Ajax;
  Since things in motion sooner catch the eye 2060
  Than what not stirs. The cry went once on thee,
  And still it might, and yet it may again,
  If thou wouldst not entomb thyself alive
  And case thy reputation in thy tent;
  Whose glorious deeds, but in these fields of late, 2065
  Made emulous missions 'mongst the gods themselves
  And drave great Mars to faction.

• Achilles. Of this my privacy
  I have strong reasons.

• Ulysses. But 'gainst your privacy 2070
  The reasons are more potent and heroical:
  'Tis known, Achilles, that you are in love
  With one of Priam's daughters.

• Achilles. Ha! known!

• Ulysses. Is that a wonder? 2075
  The providence that's in a watchful state
  Knows almost every grain of Plutus' gold,
  Finds bottom in the uncomprehensive deeps,
  Keeps place with thought and almost, like the gods,
  Does thoughts unveil in their dumb cradles. 2080
  There is a mystery—with whom relation
  Durst never meddle—in the soul of state;
  Which hath an operation more divine
  Than breath or pen can give expressure to:
  All the commerce that you have had with Troy 2085
  As perfectly is ours as yours, my lord;
  And better would it fit Achilles much
  To throw down Hector than Polyxena:
  But it must grieve young Pyrrhus now at home,
  When fame shall in our islands sound her trump, 2090
  And all the Greekish girls shall tripping sing,
  'Great Hector's sister did Achilles win,
  But our great Ajax bravely beat down him.'
  Farewell, my lord: I as your lover speak;
  The fool slides o'er the ice that you should break. 2095

[Exit]

• Patroclus. To this effect, Achilles, have I moved you:
  A woman impudent and mannish grown
  Is not more loathed than an effeminate man
  In time of action. I stand condemn'd for this; 2100
  They think my little stomach to the war
  And your great love to me restrains you thus:
  Sweet, rouse yourself; and the weak wanton Cupid
  Shall from your neck unloose his amorous fold,
  And, like a dew-drop from the lion's mane, 2105
  Be shook to air.

• Achilles. Shall Ajax fight with Hector?

• Patroclus. Ay, and perhaps receive much honour by him.

• Achilles. I see my reputation is at stake
  My fame is shrewdly gored. 2110

• Patroclus. O, then, beware;
  Those wounds heal ill that men do give themselves:
  Omission to do what is necessary
  Seals a commission to a blank of danger;
  And danger, like an ague, subtly taints 2115
  Even then when we sit idly in the sun.

• Achilles. Go call Thersites hither, sweet Patroclus:
  I'll send the fool to Ajax and desire him
  To invite the Trojan lords after the combat
  To see us here unarm'd: I have a woman's longing, 2120
  An appetite that I am sick withal,
  To see great Hector in his weeds of peace,
  To talk with him and to behold his visage,
  Even to my full of view.
  [Enter THERSITES] 2125
  A labour saved!

• Thersites. A wonder!

• Achilles. What?

• Thersites. Ajax goes up and down the field, asking for himself.

• Achilles. How so? 2130

• Thersites. He must fight singly to-morrow with Hector, and is so
  prophetically proud of an heroical cudgelling that he
  raves in saying nothing.

• Achilles. How can that be?

• Thersites. Why, he stalks up and down like a peacock,—a stride 2135
  and a stand: ruminates like an hostess that hath no
  arithmetic but her brain to set down her reckoning:
  bites his lip with a politic regard, as who should
  say 'There were wit in this head, an 'twould out;'
  and so there is, but it lies as coldly in him as fire 2140
  in a flint, which will not show without knocking.
  The man's undone forever; for if Hector break not his
  neck i' the combat, he'll break 't himself in
  vain-glory. He knows not me: I said 'Good morrow,
  Ajax;' and he replies 'Thanks, Agamemnon.' What think 2145
  you of this man that takes me for the general? He's
  grown a very land-fish, language-less, a monster.
  A plague of opinion! a man may wear it on both
  sides, like a leather jerkin.

• Achilles. Thou must be my ambassador to him, Thersites. 2150

• Thersites. Who, I? why, he'll answer nobody; he professes not
  answering: speaking is for beggars; he wears his
  tongue in's arms. I will put on his presence: let
  Patroclus make demands to me, you shall see the
  pageant of Ajax. 2155

• Achilles. To him, Patroclus; tell him I humbly desire the
  valiant Ajax to invite the most valorous Hector
  to come unarmed to my tent, and to procure
  safe-conduct for his person of the magnanimous
  and most illustrious six-or-seven-times-honoured 2160
  captain-general of the Grecian army, Agamemnon,
  et cetera. Do this.

• Patroclus. Jove bless great Ajax!

• Thersites. Hum!

• Patroclus. I come from the worthy Achilles,— 2165

• Thersites. Ha!

• Patroclus. Who most humbly desires you to invite Hector to his tent,—

• Thersites. Hum!

• Patroclus. And to procure safe-conduct from Agamemnon.

• Thersites. Agamemnon! 2170

• Patroclus. Ay, my lord.

• Thersites. Ha!

• Patroclus. What say you to't?

• Thersites. God b' wi' you, with all my heart.

• Patroclus. Your answer, sir. 2175

• Thersites. If to-morrow be a fair day, by eleven o'clock it will
  go one way or other: howsoever, he shall pay for me
  ere he has me.

• Patroclus. Your answer, sir.

• Thersites. Fare you well, with all my heart. 2180

• Achilles. Why, but he is not in this tune, is he?

• Thersites. No, but he's out o' tune thus. What music will be in
  him when Hector has knocked out his brains, I know
  not; but, I am sure, none, unless the fiddler Apollo
  get his sinews to make catlings on. 2185

• Achilles. Come, thou shalt bear a letter to him straight.

• Thersites. Let me bear another to his horse; for that's the more
  capable creature.

• Achilles. My mind is troubled, like a fountain stirr'd;
  And I myself see not the bottom of it. 2190

[Exeunt ACHILLES and PATROCLUS]

• Thersites. Would the fountain of your mind were clear again,
  that I might water an ass at it! I had rather be a
  tick in a sheep than such a valiant ignorance.

[Exit]