Act II, Scene 2

Another part of the island.

[Enter CALIBAN with a burden of wood. A noise of] [p]thunder heard]

• Caliban. All the infections that the sun sucks up
  From bogs, fens, flats, on Prosper fall and make him
  By inch-meal a disease! His spirits hear me
  And yet I needs must curse. But they'll nor pinch, 1085
  Fright me with urchin—shows, pitch me i' the mire,
  Nor lead me, like a firebrand, in the dark
  Out of my way, unless he bid 'em; but
  For every trifle are they set upon me;
  Sometime like apes that mow and chatter at me 1090
  And after bite me, then like hedgehogs which
  Lie tumbling in my barefoot way and mount
  Their pricks at my footfall; sometime am I
  All wound with adders who with cloven tongues
  Do hiss me into madness. 1095
  [Enter TRINCULO]
  Lo, now, lo!
  Here comes a spirit of his, and to torment me
  For bringing wood in slowly. I'll fall flat;
  Perchance he will not mind me. 1100

• Trinculo. Here's neither bush nor shrub, to bear off
  any weather at all, and another storm brewing;
  I hear it sing i' the wind: yond same black
  cloud, yond huge one, looks like a foul
  bombard that would shed his liquor. If it 1105
  should thunder as it did before, I know not
  where to hide my head: yond same cloud cannot
  choose but fall by pailfuls. What have we
  here? a man or a fish? dead or alive? A fish:
  he smells like a fish; a very ancient and fish- 1110
  like smell; a kind of not of the newest Poor-
  John. A strange fish! Were I in England now,
  as once I was, and had but this fish painted,
  not a holiday fool there but would give a piece
  of silver: there would this monster make a 1115
  man; any strange beast there makes a man:
  when they will not give a doit to relieve a lame
  beggar, they will lazy out ten to see a dead
  Indian. Legged like a man and his fins like
  arms! Warm o' my troth! I do now let loose 1120
  my opinion; hold it no longer: this is no fish,
  but an islander, that hath lately suffered by a
  thunderbolt.
  [Thunder]
  Alas, the storm is come again! my best way is to 1125
  creep under his gaberdine; there is no other
  shelter hereabouts: misery acquaints a man with
  strange bed-fellows. I will here shroud till the
  dregs of the storm be past.

[Enter STEPHANO, singing: a bottle in his hand]

• Stephano. I shall no more to sea, to sea,
  Here shall I die ashore—
  This is a very scurvy tune to sing at a man's
  funeral: well, here's my comfort. [Drinks]
  [Sings] 1135
  The master, the swabber, the boatswain and I,
  The gunner and his mate
  Loved Mall, Meg and Marian and Margery,
  But none of us cared for Kate;
  For she had a tongue with a tang, 1140
  Would cry to a sailor, Go hang!
  She loved not the savour of tar nor of pitch,
  Yet a tailor might scratch her where'er she did itch:
  Then to sea, boys, and let her go hang!
  This is a scurvy tune too: but here's my comfort. 1145

[Drinks]

• Caliban. Do not torment me: Oh!

• Stephano. What's the matter? Have we devils here? Do you put
  tricks upon's with savages and men of Ind, ha? I
  have not scaped drowning to be afeard now of your 1150
  four legs; for it hath been said, As proper a man as
  ever went on four legs cannot make him give ground;
  and it shall be said so again while Stephano
  breathes at's nostrils.

• Caliban. The spirit torments me; Oh! 1155

• Stephano. This is some monster of the isle with four legs, who
  hath got, as I take it, an ague. Where the devil
  should he learn our language? I will give him some
  relief, if it be but for that. if I can recover him
  and keep him tame and get to Naples with him, he's a 1160
  present for any emperor that ever trod on neat's leather.

• Caliban. Do not torment me, prithee; I'll bring my wood home faster.

• Stephano. He's in his fit now and does not talk after the
  wisest. He shall taste of my bottle: if he have
  never drunk wine afore will go near to remove his 1165
  fit. If I can recover him and keep him tame, I will
  not take too much for him; he shall pay for him that
  hath him, and that soundly.

• Caliban. Thou dost me yet but little hurt; thou wilt anon, I
  know it by thy trembling: now Prosper works upon thee. 1170

• Stephano. Come on your ways; open your mouth; here is that
  which will give language to you, cat: open your
  mouth; this will shake your shaking, I can tell you,
  and that soundly: you cannot tell who's your friend:
  open your chaps again. 1175

• Trinculo. I should know that voice: it should be—but he is
  drowned; and these are devils: O defend me!

• Stephano. Four legs and two voices: a most delicate monster!
  His forward voice now is to speak well of his
  friend; his backward voice is to utter foul speeches 1180
  and to detract. If all the wine in my bottle will
  recover him, I will help his ague. Come. Amen! I
  will pour some in thy other mouth.

• Trinculo. Stephano!

• Stephano. Doth thy other mouth call me? Mercy, mercy! This is 1185
  a devil, and no monster: I will leave him; I have no
  long spoon.

• Trinculo. Stephano! If thou beest Stephano, touch me and
  speak to me: for I am Trinculo—be not afeard—thy
  good friend Trinculo. 1190

• Stephano. If thou beest Trinculo, come forth: I'll pull thee
  by the lesser legs: if any be Trinculo's legs,
  these are they. Thou art very Trinculo indeed! How
  camest thou to be the siege of this moon-calf? can
  he vent Trinculos? 1195

• Trinculo. I took him to be killed with a thunder-stroke. But
  art thou not drowned, Stephano? I hope now thou art
  not drowned. Is the storm overblown? I hid me
  under the dead moon-calf's gaberdine for fear of
  the storm. And art thou living, Stephano? O 1200
  Stephano, two Neapolitans 'scaped!

• Stephano. Prithee, do not turn me about; my stomach is not constant.

• Caliban. [Aside] These be fine things, an if they be
  not sprites.
  That's a brave god and bears celestial liquor. 1205
  I will kneel to him.

• Stephano. How didst thou 'scape? How camest thou hither?
  swear by this bottle how thou camest hither. I
  escaped upon a butt of sack which the sailors
  heaved o'erboard, by this bottle; which I made of 1210
  the bark of a tree with mine own hands since I was
  cast ashore.

• Caliban. I'll swear upon that bottle to be thy true subject;
  for the liquor is not earthly.

• Stephano. Here; swear then how thou escapedst. 1215

• Trinculo. Swum ashore. man, like a duck: I can swim like a
  duck, I'll be sworn.

• Stephano. Here, kiss the book. Though thou canst swim like a
  duck, thou art made like a goose.

• Trinculo. O Stephano. hast any more of this? 1220

• Stephano. The whole butt, man: my cellar is in a rock by the
  sea-side where my wine is hid. How now, moon-calf!
  how does thine ague?

• Caliban. Hast thou not dropp'd from heaven?

• Stephano. Out o' the moon, I do assure thee: I was the man i' 1225
  the moon when time was.

• Caliban. I have seen thee in her and I do adore thee:
  My mistress show'd me thee and thy dog and thy bush.

• Stephano. Come, swear to that; kiss the book: I will furnish
  it anon with new contents swear. 1230

• Trinculo. By this good light, this is a very shallow monster!
  I afeard of him! A very weak monster! The man i'
  the moon! A most poor credulous monster! Well
  drawn, monster, in good sooth!

• Caliban. I'll show thee every fertile inch o' th' island; 1235
  And I will kiss thy foot: I prithee, be my god.

• Trinculo. By this light, a most perfidious and drunken
  monster! when 's god's asleep, he'll rob his bottle.

• Caliban. I'll kiss thy foot; I'll swear myself thy subject.

• Stephano. Come on then; down, and swear. 1240

• Trinculo. I shall laugh myself to death at this puppy-headed
  monster. A most scurvy monster! I could find in my
  heart to beat him,—

• Stephano. Come, kiss.

• Trinculo. But that the poor monster's in drink: an abominable monster! 1245

• Caliban. I'll show thee the best springs; I'll pluck thee berries;
  I'll fish for thee and get thee wood enough.
  A plague upon the tyrant that I serve!
  I'll bear him no more sticks, but follow thee,
  Thou wondrous man. 1250

• Trinculo. A most ridiculous monster, to make a wonder of a
  Poor drunkard!

• Caliban. I prithee, let me bring thee where crabs grow;
  And I with my long nails will dig thee pignuts;
  Show thee a jay's nest and instruct thee how 1255
  To snare the nimble marmoset; I'll bring thee
  To clustering filberts and sometimes I'll get thee
  Young scamels from the rock. Wilt thou go with me?

• Stephano. I prithee now, lead the way without any more
  talking. Trinculo, the king and all our company 1260
  else being drowned, we will inherit here: here;
  bear my bottle: fellow Trinculo, we'll fill him by
  and by again.

• Caliban. [Sings drunkenly]
  Farewell master; farewell, farewell! 1265

• Trinculo. A howling monster: a drunken monster!

• Caliban. No more dams I'll make for fish
  Nor fetch in firing
  At requiring;
  Nor scrape trencher, nor wash dish 1270
  'Ban, 'Ban, Cacaliban
  Has a new master: get a new man.
  Freedom, hey-day! hey-day, freedom! freedom,
  hey-day, freedom!

• Stephano. O brave monster! Lead the way. 1275

[Exeunt]