Speeches (Lines) for Doctor Caius
in "Merry Wives of Windsor"

Total: 49

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# Act, Scene, Line
(Click to see in context)
Speech text

1

I,4,448

(stage directions). [Enter DOCTOR CAIUS]

Doctor Caius. Vat is you sing? I do not like des toys. Pray you,
go and vetch me in my closet un boitier vert, a box,
a green-a box: do intend vat I speak? a green-a box.


2

I,4,455

Hostess Quickly. Ay, forsooth; I'll fetch it you.
[Aside]
I am glad he went not in himself: if he had found
the young man, he would have been horn-mad.

Doctor Caius. Fe, fe, fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je
m'en vais a la cour—la grande affaire.


3

I,4,458

Hostess Quickly. Is it this, sir?

Doctor Caius. Oui; mette le au mon pocket: depeche, quickly. Vere
is dat knave Rugby?


4

I,4,462

Rugby. Here, sir!

Doctor Caius. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack Rugby. Come,
take-a your rapier, and come after my heel to the court.


5

I,4,465

Rugby. 'Tis ready, sir, here in the porch.

Doctor Caius. By my trot, I tarry too long. Od's me!
Qu'ai-j'oublie! dere is some simples in my closet,
dat I vill not for the varld I shall leave behind.


6

I,4,469

Hostess Quickly. Ay me, he'll find the young man here, and be mad!

Doctor Caius. O diable, diable! vat is in my closet? Villain! larron!
[Pulling SIMPLE out]
Rugby, my rapier!


7

I,4,473

Hostess Quickly. Good master, be content.

Doctor Caius. Wherefore shall I be content-a?


8

I,4,475

Hostess Quickly. The young man is an honest man.

Doctor Caius. What shall de honest man do in my closet? dere is
no honest man dat shall come in my closet.


9

I,4,479

Hostess Quickly. I beseech you, be not so phlegmatic. Hear the truth
of it: he came of an errand to me from Parson Hugh.

Doctor Caius. Vell.


10

I,4,482

Hostess Quickly. Peace, I pray you.

Doctor Caius. Peace-a your tongue. Speak-a your tale.


11

I,4,488

Hostess Quickly. This is all, indeed, la! but I'll ne'er put my
finger in the fire, and need not.

Doctor Caius. Sir Hugh send-a you? Rugby, baille me some paper.
Tarry you a little-a while.


12

I,4,509

Hostess Quickly. [Aside to SIMPLE] Are you avised o' that? you
shall find it a great charge: and to be up early
and down late; but notwithstanding,—to tell you in
your ear; I would have no words of it,—my master
himself is in love with Mistress Anne Page: but
notwithstanding that, I know Anne's mind,—that's
neither here nor there.

Doctor Caius. You jack'nape, give-a this letter to Sir Hugh; by
gar, it is a shallenge: I will cut his troat in dee
park; and I will teach a scurvy jack-a-nape priest
to meddle or make. You may be gone; it is not good
you tarry here. By gar, I will cut all his two
stones; by gar, he shall not have a stone to throw
at his dog:


13

I,4,518

Hostess Quickly. Alas, he speaks but for his friend.

Doctor Caius. It is no matter-a ver dat: do not you tell-a me
dat I shall have Anne Page for myself? By gar, I
vill kill de Jack priest; and I have appointed mine
host of de Jarteer to measure our weapon. By gar, I
will myself have Anne Page.


14

I,4,525

Hostess Quickly. Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall be well. We
must give folks leave to prate: what, the good-jer!

Doctor Caius. Rugby, come to the court with me. By gar, if I have
not Anne Page, I shall turn your head out of my
door. Follow my heels, Rugby.


15

II,3,1102

(stage directions). [Enter DOCTOR CAIUS and RUGBY]

Doctor Caius. Jack Rugby!


16

II,3,1104

Rugby. Sir?

Doctor Caius. Vat is de clock, Jack?


17

II,3,1106

Rugby. 'Tis past the hour, sir, that Sir Hugh promised to meet.

Doctor Caius. By gar, he has save his soul, dat he is no come; he
has pray his Pible well, dat he is no come: by gar,
Jack Rugby, he is dead already, if he be come.


18

II,3,1111

Rugby. He is wise, sir; he knew your worship would kill
him, if he came.

Doctor Caius. By gar, de herring is no dead so as I vill kill him.
Take your rapier, Jack; I vill tell you how I vill kill him.


19

II,3,1114

Rugby. Alas, sir, I cannot fence.

Doctor Caius. Villany, take your rapier.


20

II,3,1121

Slender. Give you good morrow, sir.

Doctor Caius. Vat be all you, one, two, tree, four, come for?


21

II,3,1129

Host. To see thee fight, to see thee foin, to see thee
traverse; to see thee here, to see thee there; to
see thee pass thy punto, thy stock, thy reverse, thy
distance, thy montant. Is he dead, my Ethiopian? is
he dead, my Francisco? ha, bully! What says my
AEsculapius? my Galen? my heart of elder? ha! is
he dead, bully stale? is he dead?

Doctor Caius. By gar, he is de coward Jack priest of de vorld; he
is not show his face.


22

II,3,1132

Host. Thou art a Castalion-King-Urinal. Hector of Greece, my boy!

Doctor Caius. I pray you, bear vitness that me have stay six or
seven, two, tree hours for him, and he is no come.


23

II,3,1152

Host. Pardon, guest-justice. A word, Mounseur Mockwater.

Doctor Caius. Mock-vater! vat is dat?


24

II,3,1154

Host. Mock-water, in our English tongue, is valour, bully.

Doctor Caius. By gar, den, I have as mush mock-vater as de
Englishman. Scurvy jack-dog priest! by gar, me
vill cut his ears.


25

II,3,1158

Host. He will clapper-claw thee tightly, bully.

Doctor Caius. Clapper-de-claw! vat is dat?


26

II,3,1160

Host. That is, he will make thee amends.

Doctor Caius. By gar, me do look he shall clapper-de-claw me;
for, by gar, me vill have it.


27

II,3,1163

Host. And I will provoke him to't, or let him wag.

Doctor Caius. Me tank you for dat.


28

II,3,1174

(stage directions). [Exeunt PAGE, SHALLOW, and SLENDER]

Doctor Caius. By gar, me vill kill de priest; for he speak for a
jack-an-ape to Anne Page.


29

II,3,1181

Host. Let him die: sheathe thy impatience, throw cold
water on thy choler: go about the fields with me
through Frogmore: I will bring thee where Mistress
Anne Page is, at a farm-house a-feasting; and thou
shalt woo her. Cried I aim? said I well?

Doctor Caius. By gar, me dank you for dat: by gar, I love you;
and I shall procure-a you de good guest, de earl,
de knight, de lords, de gentlemen, my patients.


30

II,3,1186

Host. For the which I will be thy adversary toward Anne
Page. Said I well?

Doctor Caius. By gar, 'tis good; vell said.


31

II,3,1188

Host. Let us wag, then.

Doctor Caius. Come at my heels, Jack Rugby.


32

III,1,1267

Host. Disarm them, and let them question: let them keep
their limbs whole and hack our English.

Doctor Caius. I pray you, let-a me speak a word with your ear.
Vherefore vill you not meet-a me?


33

III,1,1271

Sir Hugh Evans. [Aside to DOCTOR CAIUS] Pray you, use your patience:
in good time.

Doctor Caius. By gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, John ape.


34

III,1,1278

Sir Hugh Evans. [Aside to DOCTOR CAIUS] Pray you let us not be
laughing-stocks to other men's humours; I desire you
in friendship, and I will one way or other make you amends.
[Aloud]
I will knog your urinals about your knave's cockscomb
for missing your meetings and appointments.

Doctor Caius. Diable! Jack Rugby,—mine host de Jarteer,—have I
not stay for him to kill him? have I not, at de place
I did appoint?


35

III,1,1286

Host. Peace, I say, Gallia and Gaul, French and Welsh,
soul-curer and body-curer!

Doctor Caius. Ay, dat is very good; excellent.


36

III,1,1302

(stage directions). [Exeunt SHALLOW, SLENDER, PAGE, and Host]

Doctor Caius. Ha, do I perceive dat? have you make-a de sot of
us, ha, ha?


37

III,1,1308

Sir Hugh Evans. This is well; he has made us his vlouting-stog. I
desire you that we may be friends; and let us knog
our prains together to be revenge on this same
scall, scurvy cogging companion, the host of the Garter.

Doctor Caius. By gar, with all my heart. He promise to bring me
where is Anne Page; by gar, he deceive me too.


38

III,2,1373

Page. You have, Master Slender; I stand wholly for you:
but my wife, master doctor, is for you altogether.

Doctor Caius. Ay, be-gar; and de maid is love-a me: my nursh-a
Quickly tell me so mush.


39

III,2,1394

(stage directions). [Exeunt SHALLOW, and SLENDER]

Doctor Caius. Go home, John Rugby; I come anon.


40

III,3,1563

Sir Hugh Evans. This is fery fantastical humours and jealousies.

Doctor Caius. By gar, 'tis no the fashion of France; it is not
jealous in France.


41

III,3,1601

Sir Hugh Evans. If there be any pody in the house, and in the
chambers, and in the coffers, and in the presses,
heaven forgive my sins at the day of judgment!

Doctor Caius. By gar, nor I too: there is no bodies.


42

III,3,1610

Sir Hugh Evans. You suffer for a pad conscience: your wife is as
honest a 'omans as I will desires among five
thousand, and five hundred too.

Doctor Caius. By gar, I see 'tis an honest woman.


43

III,3,1622

Sir Hugh Evans. If there is one, I shall make two in the company.

Doctor Caius. If dere be one or two, I shall make-a the turd.


44

III,3,1626

Sir Hugh Evans. I pray you now, remembrance tomorrow on the lousy
knave, mine host.

Doctor Caius. Dat is good; by gar, with all my heart!


45

IV,5,2376

(stage directions). [Enter DOCTOR CAIUS]

Doctor Caius. Vere is mine host de Jarteer?


46

IV,5,2378

Host. Here, master doctor, in perplexity and doubtful dilemma.

Doctor Caius. I cannot tell vat is dat: but it is tell-a me dat
you make grand preparation for a duke de Jamany: by
my trot, dere is no duke dat the court is know to
come. I tell you for good vill: adieu.


47

V,3,2532

Mistress Page. Master doctor, my daughter is in green: when you
see your time, take her by the band, away with her
to the deanery, and dispatch it quickly. Go before
into the Park: we two must go together.

Doctor Caius. I know vat I have to do. Adieu.


48

V,5,2774

(stage directions). [Enter DOCTOR CAIUS]

Doctor Caius. Vere is Mistress Page? By gar, I am cozened: I ha'
married un garcon, a boy; un paysan, by gar, a boy;
it is not Anne Page: by gar, I am cozened.


49

V,5,2778

Mistress Page. Why, did you take her in green?

Doctor Caius. Ay, by gar, and 'tis a boy: by gar, I'll raise all Windsor.


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